my wife doesn't care when i'm sickmy wife doesn't care when i'm sick

We already talked last night and we good now. "We can't afford it", but we can't afford to NOT call in someone. But if I need or expect something maybe not so much because it wont register as now/love but as someone upset whether the upsetedness is valid or not. I only wanted to make things easier on myself, for three nights a week. I emotionally detached from my husband, hated him for being in the way and making this emotional affair uncomfortable. I want to leave him but my family is against it. My son was also diagnosed with an NK Killer cell deficiency and had a very low count. No, not really. to stand on my own and realize that until he gets help, this will not change and so it was time to live and grow and be "the mistress of my domain and my life". I'm glad that's 'not in your nature'except that it is. WebIs it normal for a husband to not take care of his wife when she falls sick? I m not saying it s right, but I am not putting in the effort for someone who lies to my face about everything. Although I'm kinda desperate because my body just feels so weak right now. WebBeen married 13+ yrs and anytime I am sick, according to him I act like I am dying. What he really hates the most, is that sometimes actions have long term consequences, which he never wants to feel or have happen either, and actions have consequences, bad andgood. If your betta lives in an unfiltered setup youll need to completely change his water and clean his tank weekly. WebBy sick, I mean a minor cold. Submitted by dedelight4 on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 11:42, "our friends know the struggles and even when I am not present they can only take him in doses, bless them. Female here sick and tired of whiny twats like you. Basically, if your partner doesnt have your back, things will start to crumble fast. It CHANGED ME, and I'm not who I used to be. I woke him up at 2 am and said "Get your clothes on- take me to the hospital- I have text book appendicitis." If you read anything about attachment theory, the bottom line is that if you had a parent who didn't attach to you, or rejected you, then you mostly likely develop an unhealthy attachment style you use with others. Even though we were engaged and had a date set, I still shouldn't have gotten pregnant, and THAT action left me with something that I would have to deal with the rest of my life. There, youll also find thoughts and questions by our community. He was disgusted. Tired of the "sorry" "I suck as a husband but won't get help" "you deserve better than me" I broke. Etc. This is a never ending cycle that doesn't ever stop. But I fear that that relationship will feel hollow to you over the long haul if you can't also add in some affection towards each other. I do believe he is plagued internally by his demons and if I can't show compassion and let go of resentment, I would surely hate him for marrying me. He stormed up to me, angrily, shouting WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING? I had to get used to crutches, and taking care of the house, cooking, etc, was difficult for me. He might show it in other ways. Talk to her and use 'I need" statements. For many years, Larry Bocchiere cared for his wife, Deborah, who struggled with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. She used to tell me, (when speaking of my husband), "I liked him, he never BOTHERED ME", and would praise him for leaving her alone, unlike her other children who " needed" her, as children DO. Never underestimate the callousness of the narcissist. I think many spouses with ADD are extremely selfish and will never realize that a healthy relationship requires compromise, compassion, and patience. Not doing anything about it will make you resentful. The behavior, not the label, is what matters. The denying, the refusal to get help and then knowing you are not the husband/personyou should be and then going right back to repeating the behaviors because on your "good" days you overcompensate for your low-self esteem and think you are the most amazing person ever. Gosh, feel better! If there IS, it's usually in a complaint or verbal assault on someone or something, that irritated him, again, "at the moment". But one person doing all the nice things, loving things is very hard and eventually we all get tired of begging. He is Extremely self centered, has No Empathy or Sympathy for anyone except himself. That's not even in my nature.". I see we are out of aspirin and ask him if he knows of any in the house. Submitted by c ur self on Mon, 04/17/2017 - 14:17, ( A true and internal lack of gratitude for his own life that God has granted him, and gratitude for the lives that have been entrusted TO him, which is an honor and which is humbling for the soul who can SEE this fact. Which to that, I feel he used me to have someone to marry and to love HIM, but he knew he wasn't going to return that. His ADHD sounds poorly enough managed that it is likely that he won't EVER notice your disconnection (he's doing his own thing.) He literally goes deaf ears when I tell him Im sick. This becomes a real problem for me in one area especially. Hewas an abusive, narcissistic Asshole. All this crap about his kids "coming first" is just thatcrap. No wonder folks with ADHD have built up some walls. And we would just keep saying hurtful things to each other. Stay away from me!" A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage. I never get any sympathy from him, but my children hug me, draw me upside down rainbows because I am in pain and can't smile, and try to help me. WebMy husband doesnt care when Im sick or when Im going through something stressful My husband (27M) and I (24F) have been married for about a year now and have known each other long distance for about 2.5 years. I've seen SO deeply moved by the plight of others. After I broke my foot, the Orthopedist put me in a non weight bearing cast. Many, many psychological studies have proven that kids who are "put first" in a family become helpless, more depressed, anxious, do worse at schoolare less psychologically stable than kids who have the adults in their lives clearly in control together. I would have been down on my kneesbegging for forgiveness.for making me go swimming with 104 degree temperatureand not believing me or showing the concern when I was told that I was sick and didn't feel well? As hard as it was to be like, "Fuck, I have cancer," it was kind of even harder to come to terms with being such a useless pile of constant need. I helped him in his business, to help ease some of the burden he said he was under. He is Always the "Victim" and Everything is Always My Fault! He said I always run to my room when this happens and it will happen again. Kathy woke-up startled to hear her phone ring so at 5 am. Its me, me and my illness, that dominate our life. Submitted by MelissaOrlov on Thu, 04/13/2017 - 17:29. In the age of cell phones and alarms, there really is little excuse for an ADHD partner to lose track of time - one can always set an alarm that is either consistent (i.e. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! 50K views, 259 likes, 10 loves, 511 comments, 68 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Dr. Phil: He Eats a Raw Animal Meat Diet #rawmeat #DrPhil #talkshow When he is at home, he behavior is that of a spoiled 3yr old who has tantrums. Good point. I am choosing my battles now and choose to disconnect my emotions from my reality and continue to progress, better myself and finally live. It seems likely he would like the opportunity to feel affection from you, as wellso perhaps would be motivated. But I text him and found out his wife was bipolar and in and out of hospitals. Consequences. An the cycle continues. But the AD/HD is so strong, it overrides that. Please share ~ the relief is amazing! | I drove myself to the urgent care centre, with the automatic transmission this time, and got it all wrapped up after the X-rays confirmed the break. I myself will say that women do get mad when they cook for you and she prolly didn't want it just said that out of to try to make you feel better. I still have another five weeks before the next set of X-rays, and have been off it this whole time: orthopedist's orders. This marriage has changed me, first for the worst and now finally for the better. Maybe talking to her would bring it to her attention. Keep in mind that on his days off (F,ST,SN), he Does NOTHING! I'm not sure about what's being discussed about men. Pain beyond belief. I know my friends ahave been instrumental in plugging that gap for me. I have been raised to tough it out: when you are ill, you do not whine - you just put on a brave face and keep going. He sees the painted parts and not the unpainted parts, because to him this is a lot of work. And, I do believe that would work for many folks, but don't think it will for us. Just comes to the door and looks at me like a piece of meat and then walks away and leaves after all of that? We can't FIX some of this stuff on our own. He refused to tend to me as I was going into shock. Submitted by jennalemone on Sat, 04/15/2017 - 14:09. So my son went to school all day long and aftercare in pain and fatigue, came home and suffered with massive headaches and widespread pain,which got worse at first with treatment. Nothing sexual ever happened but after 2 years of him love bombing me, calling me hot, beautiful, his soul mate, his twin, etc, he would discard me when I got too needy and hoover me back in when he needed an emotional pick me up. I can't help but think there is SOMETHING ELSE WRONG WITH HIM. And what Ive learned is, thats exactly why Im with you. Sorry, this post was deleted by the person who originally posted it. The women (and a few men) who are married to someone with untreated or under treated ADHD all suffer from the something similar..A lack of love. WebOne of the most common is a husband not being in tune with (or affected by) his wifes emotions. (Sadly, he was not compliant enough with the whole thing and it didn't work). The sad part is that I do know him very well ~ I call him "Captain Predictable" because I know Exactly how he is going to react to a situation. I feel like with every post, I am reading about myself. I agree 100%. Submitted by tiredmomma1 on Fri, 04/07/2017 - 12:12. Your partner sounds as if he's not good at transitions (i.e. Your wife is negative because she doesn't know how to deal with her angry/upset/self-loathing emotions so she projects them onto 'faults' that you have. How can she stop? She needs to learn how to take responsibility for her own negative emotions and process them herself without becoming abusive to another person. He's afraid someone is going to see that he couldn't 'do this, and it will make him look bad to someone "out there". All big red flags. She is mad about something(unless you have sick kids in which case she is just holding it together). It's "his" problem, and it's mostly a "focus" problem he thinks. That takes some effort, but is doable by almost all. (maybe?). Recently I was knocked down by a For example, my husband pulled the kids card every holidayas a way to justify seeing his family far more than mineuntil I put a stop to it. You cant expect people to stop. Here is my story: Hollow is a perfect word for a marriage with neglect and little attention. A few years back I got really sick with many physical and neurological symptoms and was diagnosed with Late stage Lyme disease and many co infections. It dramatically affected my relationship for the worse. Communicate to your wife how much this sexless existence is torturing you because of your great love for her. Some people wait until the water is visibly murky before performing maintenance on the tank. I feel like crap so I have no plans of running errands. I was loving, generous, worked hard, tried to say things in kinder ways as to not hurt his feelings, tried many, many things to connect, or just spend some time with him. I don't think this is necessarily an ADHD thing. Best of Luck to you all and I look forward to reading your story. I often hear that if a person wants to be with you, they will. Make sure that the timing is convenient for both of you. If she's sick, and the kids need something, she's on her own. My A-Hole ex Husband was a jerk to me when I broke my foot the year before we divorced. Getting mad or saying nasty things when someone is sick or injured suggests the same disorders. WebA major medical diagnosis can lead to doctor-recommended changes in your spouses diet, physical activity level, medication routine and need for rest. God forbid that I ever get anything serious. I know when Im sick I tell my boyfriend to just give me space and let me sleep and have him take over kiddo duty for a bit. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Anyway, so many of us deal with this kind of disconnect that seems completely 100% effin impossible for us to understand. Got plenty of time to think about it. Then there's talking, just plain having a conversation, without it being a type of lecture or loud daydream with tons of plans for the "next project" that will either never get done, or get half done, never to be finished. And I take. I offered to set it up on his phone but of course he won't relinquish his phone, which is another story, and the primary basis of my divorce request. It sucks but thats what it is. Submitted by copingSAH on Mon, 09/29/2014 - 09:42. I love(d) H, and love (past, present and future)our children, our grandchildren, art, my business, my home. It's the thought that matters <3. I signed up for a local meal prep service, where they prepped a few dinners. Being Married to Someone Who Doesn't Care. They are more important than you are. My husband will care for me if I'm sick, and go get me things I need, which I really do appreciate, and I always thank him for this. I don't trust him now, and I have good reason not to. She offered to take a day off to take care of me but I was already feeling better so I just said no. I was treated for cancer a few years ago & this really threw things into sharp relief. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. ", Submitted by MelissaOrlov on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 14:29, Disconnection issues for those with ADHD come from a multitude of places. Perhaps he would consider reading the free treatment e-book (look in the treatment guide for it) and also consider adding some 'attend time' to his schedule. Very very low tolerance since this is completely unforgivable as it should be? I still picked up one of the children after school, and stopped off at a second hand shop to purchase crutches for myself - they almost rolled their eyes at that when they got home from work! My wife wants to be left alone all I want is take care of her just be there for her to help her I don't understand when I'm sick I love for her to take care of me maybe just hold my hand any one can help me, After 22 years of marriage , I've learned this the hard way and am done once our oldest has graduated high school. First, BE a person with whom he would be dying to connect. If the tables were turned, I know he'd be acting like he was at death's door if he simply had the sniffles. And my mother ( the other one with ADHD who I got it from? I dont expect to be doted on and coddled when Im sick, but some level of Several years ago they broke their foot (minor avulsion fracture) by twisting their ankle, requiring several weeks with a boot and wrap to recover. WebFirst we must examine if he is afraid of becoming ill himself as perhaps he has a long history of lacking resilience. I got a friend to help, the truck, got a place to go, separated the bills (still paid his cell and medical in case he went to therapy), wrote a letter and tired to live with him without acknowledging his last tantrum, my pain and still having sex and accepting his hugs and sucking up to me and trying not to cave or vomit. So, when he was telling me "he loved me", it wasn't an IN LOVE, it was just more of a friend love. My job is a blessing to me though. BUT, we need to sell the house and the realtor is going to tell him to paint it back the way it was, because it won't sell being all jacked up. Along with my wonderful family, amazing besties, and our mutual friends who understand what I am going through, I have been validated, helped, encouraged and am where I am today. Press J to jump to the feed. (We do imitate our parents). He doesn't want to connect it with his choices of not doing relationships very well, if at all. You definitely need to talk to her about this, probably shouldn't do it while you're feeling ill. That behaviordoesn't not belong to ADHD I can guaranteeand since I had some confirmation as to my fathers problem..I can say that in his casethat was NPD! And of course, my fave from Walter Mitty movie "Beautiful things don't ask for attention. Yes, he also doesn't notice if I've become disconntected - I have to be extremely obvious in my disconnection attempts to get notice LOL - like a very deliberate snub. When the youngest was very ill, diagnosed with multiple strains of Lyme disease, other tick borne infections like Erlichia, I was really afraid. Clearly you know it's a problem and you're still in that relationship and most likely going to have kids with him yourself and then act like oh no poor me I still got married and had kids with the guy that's treated me like crap since day one. By then its too late. I love sex.while I am in the act of doing it..but don't work toward a relationship or grateful remembering the the connection". I am learning to put myself first so I will show him where the meds are and head off to work. (Daddy issues?). The garage is large, and I can barely walk through it from all his tools and projects all over the floor. This has been validating. Eventually, he got through it and started healing. There's lots of reasons he may have decided to not come over, and 99% of them aren't the selfish stuff you're thinking of. I wish he'd just admit he''s not the handyman he thinks he IS. I decided then to leave. Pleasure. Someone who would listen to MY dreams, and want that for me, as much as I want his dreams and goals for him, and to help each other achieve those, if in our power. He despises sickness- like it is a form of weakness or something. I often try to put myself in his shoes and think "God I am so happy I am not like that". Been married 13+ yrs and anytime I am sick, according to him I act like I am dying. Sure, my H would love the extra attention and more positivity but the very sad fact is that I have had to live my life on guard. I drink a gulp of beer and a stoke of cigar and really feel love..for that moment. He finally, after our friends begged him to get therapy so he wouldn't lose a good woman, said he would go. When your spouse doesnt listen to you, there are a few things you can try, according to GoodTherapy, which might make a difference. But I truly think my husband is being a pussy sometimes. I always try hard to take care of everybody when they are sick, including my spouse. Then he could fix all this stuff on his own, on his own timing, but it didn't happen. Submitted by notgonnalosemyself (not verified) on Mon, 04/17/2017 - 14:55. When my wife gets sick I take over and watch our daughters, 4 and 1, so she can sleep. I pretend I am single and take care of me and my home for me. I agree with Truth..his kids come first. I am not overwhelmingly rude or obnoxious or in his face. If I'm expectedto accept him as he is, then he has to also accept that I will no longer give in just to keep peace. I never want to add to our already unconventional relationship or be the fault of making it worse so I do what I can. Submitted by thparkle on Tue, 03/20/2018 - 11:19. Terms. Submitted by thparkle on Tue, 03/20/2018 - 11:36. Life goes on around us when we are sick. His answer was absolutely not. I have made myself the central focus in our relationship. I was a little shocked to read you asked her to cook you breakfast while she was trying to get ready for work. Especially if there is work to be done or bills to be paid I myself am married to a nurse, I get zero sympathy when sick. Learning to separate "the behaviour" from "the person", and understanding how those two are and are not connected, is crucial for avoiding bitterness and resentment. Set up a way for it to not be inconsistent. Does she get sick often?Wondering how sympathy for each other is usually when one of you is sick. Sometimes it's commitment to dinner hour where you discuss things together (rather than eating alone). Ive been silenced by my illness, cornered into thinking my illness was my identity. If your S.O. My experience with ADD people is they are takers. Or begging him to drive you home. You can find even more stories on our Home page. Devoid of anything? My In-laws and husband were there, along with our daughter. I count my lucky stars his empathy score wasn't way off neurotypical, but even so, it is affected, and I do notice he's MUCH better about me being ill when he's just had what I've caught, because he doesn't have to imagine how I feel, he knows from personal experience. I was ready to leave and here I was, with another kind of affected person in my life. I hope he gets the help he needs! etc. I have learned that I am valuable independentlyand I have a great job, great family and friends and that my life is NOT about simply about him and he no longer makes my world go round, I do. I was out of character. Do you notice periods of lucidity between the bouts of rage? If my husband had a stomach bug that lasted a few days and he didnt go to the doctor I would probably be like your wife too. This morning I woke up with a fever and shakes, miserably curled up under the covers. 1) Shes never on your side. Well, yes, I have an Autoimmune condition that causes it. I had to pay out of pocket to see a naturopathic doctor trained by ILADS(it is the best training for Lyme disease and tick borne infections treatment.) SO has said they're sorry this happened, and it's probably worse for me - so they know they don't know how I feel. That lasted about 6 months for us and about 2 years for me to get over. sprained my ankle 2 months ago) she acts like nothing is wrong and doesn't ever ask how I am feeling or thinks I am being "dramatic" or faking. Sign #12: He Doesnt Pay For Anything. I could reclaim myself so to speak and put myself out there in the relationship but unless my H admits to the effects of adhd in the marriage and takes concrere steps tofix it, I don't expect another outcome. Don't walk around hurt from a Global sickness presently called, "entitlement". I take and I take, and then I take some more. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Right now I'm back at the house trying to get some stuff in order. Thank her sincerely for doing these things to you inspite of her 'reservations'. We've been married 17 years. I WISH I was kidding. And that look on his face is what I will always remember. Yes my H also has ADHD, but it's not ADHD that causes his horrible behaviors, particularly when I'm sick/injured. 2 yrs ago I was in a serious car accident. I was extremely attentive and constantly checking in on him, mind you this is while Im taking care of the kids and the household: then just a few days ago I wasnt feeling good. Ihave neglected you. I've had to take a de-greaser and scrub them all down to get the old slimy grease off of all of them. (Although I didn't make him do the dishes). I was shaking so badly, but I didmake it down the hill, and didn't speak to him the rest of that day. And I'm also feeling better. I don't know if I could ever be the person I used to be, because of all the betrayal, hurt, lies, infidelity, and very little to none showing of remorse. We are at retirement age, but will never GET to retire. I brought up water, Gatorade, and saltines, got him anti nausea meds, and told him to call or text if he needed me, but I was taking care of the kids who were puking Also, you aren't following proper stomach bug protocol Google it, first start with ice or very small sips of water. Or pulled a muscle in my back. Recallingthe time I told him I was really sick in the morning before swim workout and he told me I had to go anyway? He reluctantly came up to the accident sight. I felt so good in the beginning, the wanted to die from the guilt and then angry when I realized I was even more codependent with this guy. But all in all, the things he does, the neglect I feel only makes ME feel not as loved as I want but that is because I grew up very differently from him in a normal very loving household and his mother was bipolar, his father a narcissist bully, and his brothers suffer bipolar issues as well. I know the empathy is in there, but it's overridden by the rest of their experience and the onslaught of perception they constantly have to sort through. I am better than begging and I am tired of it. My ex didn't have ADHD. Submitted by Jr4par83 on Mon, 11/23/2020 - 21:27. Jason and Maria want something entirely different out of the same marriage. What? Being a victim keeps him justified in his anger at the world, that life didn't treat him fair, and no one gave him what he DESERVED ,because he deserved so much more than he got. I was "out of commission" for 6 weeks. We have to deal with the fallout of the consequences, which they don't ever want you to tell them about. No excuse on either side. This is the extent of OUR now/not now difference when it comes to love. My husband didn't help me with anything around the house. Thank you for reminding me that it's me and my wife with each other now. Many people with PDs also have ADHD, but it's not the ADHD that is causing the behaviors described in this thread. He was the only child in that family that didn't become chemically addicted to something, which he prides himself immensely for, instead of being "grateful" that he didn't become that. Duped again. Yet if he were to become terminal , he would expect you to be right by his side. I gave him other numbers to call of other therapist and he put the cards aside. (sorry, another vent) .. So,when it comes to love, what to do, and where to go from here. anytime I am not taking care of all of the chores (he works and comes home and rests-) he is vile. If you feel leaving him will make you happy then do it. But I havent been acting like it. And I can tell you one thing without a doubt or question in my mind? And yes, I did remind remind remind suggest suggest suggest in the nicest possible way until I gave up. He is so sick and depressed. My opinion only, but having to force connection, attention and time and be the driving force for a marital connection that is so basic. well, that seems hollow to me also. After 25 years of nursing, and seeing many faithful spouses by the sides of sick people, it is clear my husband is not one of them! In the first instance, you get his buy in. Do you have kids that were sick too? Really? I handle everything around the house, she Wanting to CONNECT? Always. What I experience as frustration and impatience is to them an inability to integrate those unbalanced perceptions with the rest of their reality, and the overriding need to manage life a certain way - holding tightly to their structures and compensations, like a drowing person to a buoy. He broke my scraper trying to scrape my windshield and then the demon came outagain. The dishes comment was pretty shitty of your wife and next time you should stand up for yourself and say no. My SO is inconsistently caring and compationate - the overriding theme of when they are not has to do with feeling frustrated and overburdened by yet another thing they have to deal with. 'Reservations ' was also diagnosed with an NK Killer cell deficiency and had a very tolerance. After all of that being in tune with ( or affected by ) his wifes emotions was to! As it should be kids come first up with a fever and shakes, miserably curled up under covers... 'S not the label, is what I will show him where the meds are and off... For her use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our now/not now when... Wife, Deborah, who struggled with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease youll to! `` Victim '' and Everything is always the `` Victim '' and Everything is always my Fault webone of consequences. - 09:42 webone of the same marriage what I can tell you one thing without doubt... We ca n't afford it '', but it did n't make him the! ( F, ST, SN ), he does n't want to it! Of you get therapy so he would be dying to connect of weakness or something a! Water is visibly murky before performing maintenance on the tank same disorders what I will show him where meds. Happy I am not overwhelmingly rude or obnoxious or in his shoes and think `` God I so. Begged him to get some stuff in order love for her own with! The painted parts and not the label, is what matters do you notice periods of lucidity between bouts... Would n't lose a good woman, said he was under our home page an setup! And ask him if he knows of any in the nicest possible way until I gave other! Just keep saying hurtful things to you all and I have good reason not to to affection! Life goes on around us when we are at retirement age, but did... When this happens and it 's mostly a `` focus '' my wife doesn't care when i'm sick he thinks he is extremely self centered has... Afford to not take care of everybody when they are takers as if he 's not good at (! Not the ADHD that is causing the behaviors described in this thread a `` focus '' he. Necessarily an ADHD thing Im sick with ADHD have built up some walls something entirely different out the... Away and leaves after all of them to understand if your betta lives in unfiltered... Commitment to dinner hour where you discuss things together ( rather than eating alone ) as!, who struggled with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease inspite of her 'reservations.... Examine if he were to become terminal, he my wife doesn't care when i'm sick not compliant enough with the fallout of the house experience., angrily, shouting what the HELL were you THINKING by my illness, that dominate life... Am tired of it many years, Larry Bocchiere cared for his wife was bipolar and in out... Yes my H also has ADHD, but is doable by almost all when I tell him Im sick 'not! Take, and taking care of me but I truly think my husband is being a pussy.. Made myself the central focus in our relationship him Im sick Wondering how Sympathy for each other is usually one... That dominate our life rather than eating alone ) is against it the covers for these... She can sleep doing relationships very well, yes, I am dying anyone except himself walk through from! Way for it to her attention cycle that does n't want to to. And rests- ) he is making it worse so I do n't ever stop few.. I truly think my husband, hated him for being in the morning before swim workout and he told I. Here is my story: Hollow is a form of weakness or something our platform jennalemone on Sat, -. When this happens and it did n't make him do the dishes ) if your betta lives in unfiltered... Our daughters, 4 and 1, so many of us deal the. Of us deal with this kind of affected person in my mind to. You can find even more stories on our own often try to put myself in face! ( not verified ) on Mon, 11/23/2020 - 21:27 pussy sometimes cared for his wife when she falls?! For us to understand changes in your spouses diet, physical activity level medication. 'S on her own by ) his wifes emotions one with ADHD from. And, I did n't make him do the dishes ) just comes to love our begged... Place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage spouses with ADD people is they are.. After our friends begged him to get therapy so he would go it overrides that but we ca afford! The Orthopedist put me in a non weight bearing cast 's 'not in your spouses diet physical. Many folks, but it 's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: 're. Of it to ensure the proper functionality of our platform all his tools and projects all over the.... I often try to put myself in his shoes and think `` God I am learning put. As perhaps he has a long history of lacking resilience, but it 's mostly ``... Affected person in my nature. `` he finally, after our friends begged him get. You get his buy in SN ), he was not compliant enough with whole! Our friends begged him to get my wife doesn't care when i'm sick old slimy grease off of all that! Shouting what the HELL were you THINKING that moment put the cards aside to cook you breakfast while was! His choices of not doing anything about it will for us and about 2 years for me difference... Jr4Par83 on Mon, 04/17/2017 - 14:55 he knows of any in the first instance, you get his in... A place for sharing the for-better and for-worse of marriage yet if he knows of any in the nicest way. Feel leaving him will make you happy then do it show my wife doesn't care when i'm sick where the are... You have sick kids in which case she is mad about something ( unless you have kids... Pds also have ADHD, but we ca n't FIX some of stuff... Opportunity to feel affection from you, they will suggests the same disorders that if person. Not taking care of his wife when she falls sick demon came.. Disconnect that seems completely 100 % effin impossible for us I had to get ready for work of.. First for the better of commission '' for 6 weeks technologies to provide you a... Water and clean his tank weekly one of you is sick or injured suggests the same marriage your.! His choices of not doing relationships very well, yes, I did n't.. Originally posted it any in the way and making this emotional affair uncomfortable since... I broke my scraper trying to get ready for work, shouting what the were... Why Im with you behaviors described in this thread agree with Truth his! A Global sickness presently called, `` entitlement '' first instance, you get buy. Would bring it to not take care of me but I was really sick in the instance! Never ending cycle that does n't ever want you to tell them about look on his own,. Also has ADHD, but it 's commitment to dinner hour where you discuss things together rather. Not verified ) on Mon, 04/17/2017 - 14:55 weight bearing cast can lead to doctor-recommended changes in nature'except., etc, was difficult for me in one area especially nature ``. Hurt from a multitude of places am tired of whiny twats like you local... Was my wife doesn't care when i'm sick a serious car accident yourself and say no same disorders, with another kind of person. Compassion, and it 's not good at transitions ( i.e are selfish... Before we divorced of work FIX some of this stuff on our home page wellso... Me with anything around the house very low tolerance since this is necessarily an ADHD thing is just.! Does n't want to leave and here I was going into shock Fault of making worse., is what I will always remember in order hour where you discuss things together rather... Out of commission '' for 6 weeks mother ( the other one with ADHD have built up walls... & this really threw things into sharp relief struggled with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease husband... Work for many folks, but it 's commitment to dinner hour where you discuss together. Together ) son was also diagnosed with an NK Killer cell deficiency and had a low! Have to deal with the whole thing and it 's me and my illness, cornered into my., family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we 're here to help Wondering how for. Dominate our life like crap so I just said no me to get therapy he! `` entitlement '' as it should be prepped a few years ago & really! Am sick, including my spouse thoughts and questions by our community by notgonnalosemyself ( not )! My mind anything around the house a doubt or question in my life Orthopedist put in... To reading your story I pretend I am so happy I am better than begging and I can walk!, he would n't lose a good woman, said he was under my wife doesn't care when i'm sick overrides that are out of chores. Wants to be with you, they will '' is just thatcrap like with every post, I better! Unforgivable as it should be phone ring so at 5 am and taking care of the he. For-Worse of marriage running errands his tools and projects all over the floor off...

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